Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of April 19, 2026
If you ever want the Ellis Island experience circa 1907, swing into the Chicago City Clerk’s office in Portage Park. The number of different accents is loads of fun and reminds you of the shared American Experience, which is that city bureaucracy is no fun for any of us.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of April 12, 2026
Whining children is the leading cause of stomach fat.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of April 6, 2026
Just curious… Is Baron Trump registered for the draft? If not, it looks like he will be. I just hope he doesn’t develop bone spurs and can become the war hero his father views himself as.
No Quiero Taco Bell
Why am I doing this? Why am I having to navigate a digital menu when I could just tell an employee my order with greater speed and ease because they know better how to navigate this thing? And while I was planning on using my credit card to pay, what if I wanted to use cash? What if someone who doesn’t have a credit card, like, say, a homeless person scrounges up enough money for a Crunch Wrap Supreme? How are they to make the purchase and feed themselves? It’s rare that I feel this way, but I felt… offended.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of March 29, 2026
Our society is becoming so reliant on systems that we’re inadvertently making ourselves less capable, less self-sufficient. Dumber. Hell, I don’t even wipe my ass anymore. I have a bidet do it.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of March 15, 2026
Listening to Kenny Loggins’ brand of Rock ‘n’ Roll is like watching a high school kid play an elderly person in the Spring Play. We all know I’s not real, but we go along with it because it’s cute.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of March 8, 2026
If you must suffer fools, do so with a vengeance.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of March 1, 2026
I’ve come to believe that the brand statement of Global Consumerism is “Fuck you, Consumer.”
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of February 15, 2026
If the Royal Family has enough sense in their inbred brains to support the arrest and subsequent punishment of the Andrew Formerly Known as Prince, then American leaders ought to have equal sense to investigate and punish the other Epstein-related offenders. Or, at the very least, admit that American Power is too insulated for true justice to ever have a chance at prevailing and own up to being a criminal enterprise. Something far worse than being inbred. (Though, probably not as bad as being married to Meghan Markle.)
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of February 8, 2026
People who post personal or political opinions on LinkedIn are the same people who walk into crowded elevators and fart. “I’m living my truth and everywhere is appropriate for me to do whatever I want.”
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of February 1, 2026
“Stop, look, and listen” is great advice for crossing the street, but it also applies to entering a new job, a new relationship, a new… well, anything. Best to learn the lay of the land before you go reaping and sowing, lest your efforts be met with extreme distrust and petulant resistance.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of January 18, 2026
Chicagoans are tough. How tough? We can survive a double-digit sub-zero winter day with our kids at home when schools close due to the freeze. That’s how tough.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of January 11, 2025
If you ever need a pick-me-up, come over and let my 3-year-old serenade you with a song about poop and trucks.
C:\garbage\takethisjob.exe -shoveit
What kind of bored, unread, over-measured, automaton signed off on this AI-generated dreck? Job-hiring isn’t human resources, it’s resourcing our brain’s data to power the click-clacking of computer keys so the boss can feel good about doling out over-taxed bonuses that hardly represent the bonus time you gave the company.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of January 4, 2026
Remember on Sesame Street, how Bert was, like, really into pigeons? The fuck with that guy? Pigeons. Pigeons!? I think there was a gas leak in that garden apartment of his.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 14, 2025
If you’re not feeling the Holiday Spirit, turn on Elvis’ Christmas album. That’ll do the trick. Every time. Guaranteed. Try it. You’ll thank me. You’ll thank me very much.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 7, 2025
Never give up. Don’t stop, just start. That’s the trick. The hardest part is starting. Genius only comes to a running mind.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of November 30, 2025
Your life is not what you make it. It is what life lets you get away with.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of November 16, 2025
How many parents use the drive to school as an opportunity to educate their young children about the impact of Snoop and Dre’s masterpiece “Ain’t Nuthin’ but a G Thang?” Just me? Dope.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of November 9, 2025
Kids who had race car beds probably grew up to work in finance with an inflated ego, a coke habit, and wildly premature ejaculation issues. But for that moment in third grade, they were gods.
If you ever want the Ellis Island experience circa 1907, swing into the Chicago City Clerk’s office in Portage Park. The number of different accents is loads of fun and reminds you of the shared American Experience, which is that city bureaucracy is no fun for any of us.